not coherent. just random

i am always near tears these past few days. a simple song heard over the radio, a child on the street, an old lady, even just an e-mail could trigger me into a crying bout. and for the life of me i can't seem to concentrate on anything now. it's like a long staying virus i'm usually chirpy and smiley all the time. maybe because almost everyone around me is sick. and i dont mean the colds-cough kinda sick. a friend has cancer, an aunt just recently underwent an operation for lung cancer, another one very close to me is undergoing a biopsy for throat cancer.. and on and the list goes. it's so frustrating. 

i was supposed to go to the IDP areas for another round of relief efforts but can't seem to put my foot down and organize it. writing deadlines have been piling up. i have declined more than 5 party invitations and i don't even blog that often anymore. can't seem to shake it off.

this is supposed to be the season of joy... and all i feel is the exact opposite. Rashid has a christmas presentation in a few hours, dressed as a reindeer he is going to sing "The Twelve Days of Christmas".. i'm forcing a smile and trying my best to be chirpy..

mommy chirpy. bad entry. venting so i can function properly. sorry guys. will be better tomorrow.

peace & light.